Hi rzande1
Do you make up poor excuses for not going out on social occasions? "I'm not feeling well", "I have loads of work to do" or maybe "Yeah sure I'll meet you there" when you actually have no intention of actually turning up not just now and again but virtually every time you're invited out.
Do you go all hot and sweaty when presented with this kind of situation, feel like you're trapped and need to just hide away somewhere like a toilet because you know no one will follow you in there and you can spend a few minutes composing yourself before getting back out there? Do you find it easier talking to people online rather than face to face? If you've been to a place before and you didn't freak out too much are you more willing to go there in the future? When you commute into college do you keep to the same journey every day? Do you start to get anxious if your bus/train looks like it might be late? To the point where you again feel like you need to get back to a safe place and maybe even go home and just pretend you're sick that day?
When you're in a comfortable situation do you come out of yourself and become very social? maybe even really over the top?
Do you kid yourself that you'll have more fun staying home and watching TV or playing on your computer than going out into the real world?
If this is you (notice I've not even mentioned girls) then I would suggest there may well be a medical problem. Once you get the above sorted then the whole girl thing will sort itself out!
So what do you need to fix the problem? Here's what I had to fix me:
A wonderful doctor who was very sympathetic
Seroxat (known as Paxil in the US)
Lilith (Who suggested I might have social anxiety and whipped me until I went to see a doc THANK YOU lil!
)
and Loulabelle who wasn't turned off by the thought of a potential boyfriend with what is to all intents and purposes is a mental illness.
What would I have if I didn’t make the changes??
Well I got made redundant from my job the day I started on Seroxat I’m sure a big contributing factor was the time I refused to work for a couple of days in an office a couple of hundred miles away from my comfortable office.
Living with my parents feeling safe and never going out spending all my money and time on computers so I could chat to people.
Generally being miserable!
What is my life like because I made the changes?
I’ve been through a couple of jobs got myself a great job after being more comfortable and confident in interviews (actually got offered 3).
I’ve been to Italy twice to appear in small movies!
I’ve moved out of my parents house to live with Lou 90 miles away from “home”
3years down the line and Lou n I are now married and went all the way to Bali to do it!!