Two year old require more patience than I possess.

Today, for instance, my son has managed to pull every book off the bookshelf, every DVD off the rack, get the VCR jammed (yes, i still own one) pull all his pullups out of the package, rip the sheets off the bed, eat cat food, and dump laundry detergent all over my living room rug...twice. I strongly suspect he flushed the soap down the toilet. I have no evidence to prove his, except for the facts that the soap is missing and the toilet is backed up. He also followed behind me undoing every housekeeping chore that I managed to get accomplished.

The child has 86 arms. Two are constantly seen. The rest only jut out as needed to create chaos and mayhem. They are never seen, but their effects are felt throughout the house.

Any suggestions for me so that my child might live to see three, and I might stay out of jail?

LAW

P.S. Yes, I spank.