Well Ladies and Gents... I do have something to say to this and I just hope I can say it without giving another crazy long story into my past... I will try to be as short and sweet as possible.
If anyone has read some of my previous posts they have seen some about my first. Well I usually don't talk about when he just picked up and ran to Hawaii, cause that is a long story all in it's self. Well when he ran to Hawaii, he left me obviously... talk about being depressed and hurt, I was the poster child. I imedately turned to the internet to find someone that would be a good "replacement," I realize this wasn't the smartest idea now... well I have realized that about a lot of things I have done. But a few nights into searching I found someone.
He was my Archie... I conected very quickly to Archie because he was different, he was very careful about what he said and seemed to be a good guy and very cautious. He wouldn't tell me specific things about himself, for instance his age, and location. He just told me all the time I was perfect for him and I fit into his standards. I talked to him almost every night and we truely missed each other when we didn't see each other online. We were perfect until the unthinkable happened....
The new Hawaiian decided he didn't enjoy Hawaii as much as he thought he would and decided he needed to come home. Well this made my heart do flips and everything that Archie had done to help me get over him was out the window. The only person I wanted to be with was my first. I continued to talk to Archie, I talked to him much much Much more often than my first, and he always tried to make me see that My first was not a good person for me. So I asked Archie if he was the right person for me, he fed me the BS line of I needed someone better. I begged Archie several times to tell me more about him, but I finally droped it, and we just always talked about me or about how I wanted to meet him or at least hear his voice.
A month down the road, I found out how right he was about my first... he had started dating someone and didn't have a second thought about me. At that moment all I wanted was Archie and that stayed that way from March-September. In the summer we grew really close and really far away, he started calling me, but from an online service, so I wouldn't hear his voice but he would hear mine and I couldn't call him back. Actually in July we started having problems because I told him about pixies and that I had just became a member. I tried to explain everything to him... but he didn't understand, he couldn't see why I wanted to be a member of a sex site. He forgave me for going here, and told me I could but he would monitor what I said in chat by going to the statistics and reading any and all of my quotes.
I loved Archie... we had talked from late Decemer till September. In September I expressed to Archie that I could not keep our relationship online, I needed to be touched and held. He told me that my timeline was too fast for him and that we would meet some day when he felt comfortable. This wasn't good enough for me, whether that was right or wrong. Well a coworker started hitting on me so we started dating, and suddenly Archie wasn't online anymore. I told him about Jason and told him that I was interested in dating this guy. This hurt Archie very much... understandably, I told him for monthes how much I loved him. But the thought of having someone close to hold was better than waiting online.
Jason wasn't the one for me... by far... and I always wonder if I would have stuck with Archie where would we be now. I have heard from him about 6 times since he just disappeared from being online. Once was Christmass he sent me 50 dollars that I refuse to spend until he talks to me again in a continuous mannor. This past December would have been a year for us, I emailed him and reminded him, and he did reply and promised that in January he would sign on and talk to me... but guess who hasn't it's March now... but I still am on waiting for him almost every night. Don't get me wrong I am not stuck on him like I use to be, and I would never look to him for a relationship.... but I have definatly learned to not get attached to someone till I meet them.
I feel like online relationships can work and I am still willing to try them, I just know I need to do things a little different so that I don't find myself in the situation I was with Archie.
I hope this was helpful... it probably wasn't... I guess I just wanted to talk about it cause I haven't to really anyone... anyway this is one of my online experiences that didn't work. I will let you know if one of my current ones do...
Good Luck... I know what it is like to want to meet someone that doesn't want to meet you, I was driven up the wall several times, especially in the begining cause I didn't understand what was wrong with me and why he didn't want to meet me. I spent many days crying about it, I thought I had learned to get over it during the summer but really I just dropped him as soon as someone in "real life" showed an interest. I know that was a mistake... but Archie wanted me to wait indefinately. I look back at what happened when I first told him about Jason and see how he started to tell me things so that I would stay... at the time I didn't notice... I was busy living my "real" life. It takes a strong person to stick with an online relationship esp when there is a person you have met that is showing an interest, I was oviously not strong enough. So again... I wish you luck, and the only way I stoped crawling up the wall to meet him... was finding someone else, and hurting him badly.
I suck... I'm a horrible person... I know...