I had no intentions of returning to this site after my last post, but curiosity got the better of me and now I feel compelled to respond.

I am really amazed by the number of responses and debate that a thread posted by an outsider has generated here.

I seem to be in the minority on my views of what constitutes cheating, but there are a number of resopnses which bring up the point that it is ultimately up to the individual and their SO to be open and honest and respectful of each other. This is where my problem lies.

To those of you who think PM's are innocent flirtation, I don't agree. When the message is something like: "Mmmmm, Thanks for the orgasm." And I'm told this was a response to e-mail exchange, I don't consider that innocent.

Oldfart - This isn't about control, it's about violation of trust.

At this time I would like to ask all of you pixies for a favor. Can you please let this thread end here while I still have a little bit of my dignity left. If some of you feel like you want to discuss the topic further among yourselves, could you please start a new thread? I would consider it an honor if you would let me have the last word on the thread that I started.

Thanks for your help.
Jen