I've talked to many people in the exact same situation as yours. They used to be mostly men, but more an more women are finding themselves in this situation.

I blame society for the most part, regarding these situations. Because of upbringing, taboos, and that rut we can all fall into during our day to day lives. But there is also the mental factor. Some people, especially men get scared when their wives or SO changes from the routine that has been long established. They can be afraid that they can't meet the expectations of their partner.

So if you are serious about turning things around, plan on devoting yourself to a long term plan. Slowly bring about small changes to your sexual relationship over a long period of time, giving your SO time to adjust to them. The shock factor will be limited, and it will make him more acceptable to the changes. Remember, its only kinky the first time. ha ha.

Make specific plans to compensate and overcome the excuses. Sexual adventures on days off so he's not tired. A night in a hotel, where there are no distractions. Wear a sexy dress out to dinner, and halfway through, tell him you have nothing on under it, just for him. It will let his imagination run wild for a little while. Put a pair of your underware in his breafcase, or coat pocket. It will get his mind moving in the right direction before he gets home. Every day, comment on his cute ass, and give it a little pat or pinch. Make a habit of getting out of the shower, and dressing in front of him. Bring a bunch of grapes to bed, and eat them while laying nude on top of the covers, offering him some too, one at a time.

None of these necessarily will have to lead to sex, but it will keep the idea at the forefront of his mind, and thats where you want it.

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