I am a victim of emotional and physical abuse as a child and also of rape as a 16 year old so i have a fair idea where you come from.

I was totally unable to handle it at all and it effected mt so badly that I felt dirty, useless and unloved for 15 years. I had few relationships and unless i was at work or doing a sporting or community activity, I hid away from the world. I tried suicide at 30 and only then did I get what I has needed all along, professional help.

I will always have the effects of those bad times but I have risen above it and now you can put it where it belongs too. You have a wife that you love so don't allow the past to take the present away.

Best of luck Seaker take care mate