We've had Witchita Linemen,
And rodeo super stars,
And sweet and pretty ladies,
There in soft, dim lit bars,

But have you ever heard the country song about
The sewer rat in Texas in a town called Cut and Shoot.
A tale that smells to heaven,
And drips with gook from off his boot.

He was working late that evening,
The Texas sky still glowed,
There were problems in the main line
And it was his turn to go.

Took a bit, but soon he finished,
And climbed the ladder to the surface.
That's when he saw Pruddy Trueblood,
She was a vision of loveliness.

She saw his eye upon her
Watching as he stood then on the street,
And he saw her moist red lips move,
And her voice so soft and sweet ...

"I saw you reach the surface,
I saw you then climb out,
You might have even tempted me,
'Cept for the crappy smell about ...

And the ooze your boot is dripping,
Does nothing for your charms,
So I guess I'll turn and leave you
Like I'd pass a hog filled farm."

I cried a soft tear of sorrow,
Cuz' she really was a piece,
But she was right about the smell and crap,
Even I could hardly breath.

"Oh well," I thought,
It wasn't meant to be.
I'll shower soon and walk on down,
To the bar at Fifth and Lee.

There'll I'll find a new love,
I'd guess now, Mary Sue,
We'll have some tasty tidbits,
And drink some potent brew.

Then we'll retire to the local inn,
And make a night of it,
And another little mess we'll make.
But this one we'll enjoy a bit.

And when I see Miss Pruddy Trueblood,
I'll tip my hat and say,
"Sorry that ya' left me,
But it was surely most okay.

That night was very good to me,
Had company to share,
And we had a jolly time that night,
Me and my lady fair."