Cock Envy
 

Why oh why is it that when my dear sweet loving husband buys me vibes/dildos they are never shaped like a dick??????????????

I go through the catalogs with him and show him all these glorious thick cocks I'd love to ride when he's AWOL. Some are black and some are white. Some are short and thick, some are thin and long. Some are pink, some are tan. Some have defined ridges, some have veins that look ready to burst.


BUT all of them look like a REAL penis!!!!!!!!!!!!! Today once again, and trust me I'm not looking a gift vibrator in the mouth, I knew a package was coming and was soooooo looking forward to finally fucking myself with a real imitation penis. But true to form it looks like a gigantic swirly pink thing but not a cock.:(

Liil... go here and have it sent to me. I'll take care of the rest. ;)

Would make a lovely Valentine's gift :D

I tried to order one of those kits a couple of years ago from a different site, and it never did turn up. I thought it would be the perfect solution to Fussy's and my long distance relationship problem.....but alas it wasn't to be.

Nearly all mine a cock shaped *L*....does that mean Bilbo is comfy with his cock size

The only one I have shaped like a cock was hidden in the drawer by the chef. Hmmmm, what's up with that?

lol. it looks like earthworm jim...ya know? that video game guy. you should sharpie some eyes on there and sit on the bed with it, when mr. lil comes home he'll find you doing the looney toons abominable snow man thing ... i will love him and hug him and squeeze him and call him wormy.

actually, i have no clue why he doesn't take the hint. maybe you should just hit him upside the head with it (batteries included), and knock some sense into him. :p:D

Well, Lil, you have to admit it is DIFFERENT!!! It kind of reminded me a the mouthpart for the old Cootie game.

I think Aqua's idea is a great one. Just let all of the Pixie guys you fancy know that you like them to send you a facsimile...just think of the endless fantasies you'd be able to have!!!!

LOL you are so right!!!!

rabbit....I'm sure The Rabbit would have nothing on your rabbit;)

Joking aside Lil, when I bought my very first vibrator with an ex of mine, he was insistent that he did NOT want a penis shaped one, as he thought that would be wierd. Then again he had some penis issues because his had been operated on several times and was somewhat irregular in shape....

Actually, your new one looks *kinda* like a cock....with a tongue. :p

I haven't tried it yet but it's a Dr. Sue one and vibrates nice and quiet :D

Though that toy does look fun...I understand what you mean.

I think I have a solution though. I've been working on cutting edge technology that just might help.

Drop your firewall and open a port directly to my computer. Take all your clothes off and actually squat next to the monitor. I'll transfer a molecular likeness of...well, maybe a picture would be easier.

LOL...good one! And true!

:p